One of the central themes of the Bible is exile and return. It goes like this: God calls His people, Israel, to holiness. They succeed at first, but then they fail through sin. Their brokenness leads them to hide from God and turn away from their relationship, leading to exile. But God seeks them out and they repent, turning back to Him. God brings them home to Him and the sadness of their exile is turned into joy. This happens over and over again in varying degrees from Adam and Eve, to slavery in Egypt, to the Babylonian exile.
Doesn’t this pattern sound familiar? It certainly has been my experience. I know that I’m called to holiness, but I often fail through sin. Sometimes, like Adam and Eve, my instinct is to hide from God when I fail (Genesis 3:8). But Jesus seeks me out and speaks gently to my conscience. I come back to myself and repent, like the prodigal son (Luke 15:17). Jesus, the Good Shepherd, lays me like a lamb on His shoulders and carries me back to the fold (Luke 15:5). He leads me on the path back home.
The key, I think, to repentance is listening to and following my conscience. St. John Henry Newman called the conscience “the aboriginal Vicar of Christ” in the soul. It’s the ancient yet present voice of Christ, our King and our Good Shepherd. Christ speaks directly to each person’s heart as “behind a veil.” It “teaches and rules us,” but only if we listen to it. Our consciences call us to repent when we have done something against God’s will. They exhort us to let go of sin and turn away from whatever is keeping our hearts from loving and being loved, be it sin or woundedness.
Jesus, prepare my heart for Your coming. Whatever is prideful, whatever is crooked, whatever is rough—level them and make my heart smooth. Fill up what is lacking or wounded in me. Help me listen to Your voice deep in my heart. Bring me home to you again.
Readings for December 5, 2021, The second Sunday in Advent
- Baruch 5:1-9
- Psalm 126:1-6
- Philippians 1:4-6, 8-11
- Luke 3:1-6